Brittain, Vera, Diary, 22 August 1915

00000298-25.jpg
Description: 
Diary of Vera Brittain

Tabs

Case Study: 
From Youth to Experience: Vera Brittain’s Work for Peace in Two World Wars
Creator: 
Brittain, Vera
Source: 
diary
Date: 
22 August 1915
Collection/Fonds: 
Contributer: 
McMaster University Libraries
Rights: 
Vera Brittain estate; McMaster University has a non-exclusive licence to publish this document.

Identifier: 
00000298-25
Language: 
eng
Type: 
image
Format: 
jpg
Transcript: 

she felt that after all the writer of the letters was the person she knew best.
In trying to recall that long talk with her I find I can only remember it vaguely, in impression, not in detail. But I know I said all I wanted to regarding my doubts as to whether I was the best person for him, whether he knew his own mind at so early an age and whether if he came through the war I should hinder his career in any way. She said during this time that she thought I was capable of making sacrifices for those I loved & I said "I can now if it is the best thing for him." She told me that she received his letter telling her to tell me he was coming she wondered if as he had not written to me the affection was cooling; it would have surprised her a little if it had been & when she heard how he had had to keep the post ordely waiting even to scrawl a line to her, still more when she had seen us together she had realised there was no "cooling off" on his part at any rate. She said she knew from what he had said, still more from what she had noticed that he loved me very much indeed; what I think she really wondered was whether I loved him as much as she had always hoped the girl he chose would love him. But in spite of my involuntary coldness I think I convinced her that I did. I put myself at every possible disadvantage & glossed over more of the factors against our engagement, for I could not endure the basis of anything so important to be insecure anywhere. I reminded her that he was very young -- younger even than I, but she did'nt not [sic]seem to take this latter objection (if indeed it really is one) into account at all; she said it was so little that it was of no importance. As to his youth, she said he was certainly